Thanks for the encouragement Arlee.
I've already had a flute teacher: there are only about 3 where I live, and I've phoned all of them. Only 1 of them was available and I had a lesson from him. It was a complete waste of $50 (or about 32 UK pounds).
I've realised, that despite all my numptiness and asking for help on this forum, I had a problem which no one here has been able to help me with. I'm not saying this forum is a complete waste of time, however there are too many variables for a numptie to cover, and it's rare that anyone will have the patience on a forum. Besides, any free advice is free...or what it's worth. That's better than paying $50 for flute teaching advice, and getting none of it.
My problem? I discovered it weeks later after I made it into a flute centre and tested a number of flutes. Slowly, it dawned on me ... that the flute I have .... is leaky and needs adjustment.
Having tried to force and blow; huff and puff; tongue and angle the air frantically to make any and every kind of embouchure just to hit the second octave, I finally plucked up the courage and took a screwdriver to my flute's keys and altered the heights of the coin operated levers so that they actually seal when they are supposed to.
It is so incredibly easy to hit the second octave and third octave now. I can't believe how simple it is. I was straining myself to force my tongue half way up my nose just to get the F sharp on the upper staff line. Now I just read the note and it plays without any effort. With a perfect working flute, I feel much more confident in learning to play with my own book methods without a teacher. My first teacher completely missed checking my flute was competent (maybe that was my job, but I'm learning and didn't know any better), and even doing the most basic of embouchure checks. For reference - if you are interested in teaching yourself, the Trevor Wye practice books are probably a step too advanced, however the Simon Hunt book is ideal, since it phrases learning in pithy questions which can be used for self-direction.
If anyone else is struggling to hit the 'top notes' and has just started out on the flute, I'd recommend you make sure you have a perfectly adjusted flute which seals all the notes in the lower octave, and tighten the springs for some resistance, but not complete resistance so that overblowing results.
I still suck at playing the flute, but at least not as unbelievably bad and squawky as I was before
