i guess its so hard to not aim for perfection. especially considering how bad I want this. and how bad my mothers wallet wants this too (if I get in, lessons are free - and Im too broke myslef to pay for them). Its just, logically, say if you want to memorize words for a test or something, the more you say it the better youll remember it. I apply this to practising. even though at the audition ill have the music in front of me, its just a fear of screwing up when it counts that makes me want to play it more in the practise room. sometimes I even still screw up in the practise room. today its purely fatigue though, and I know that so im not being too hard on myself.
tonight I get to relax for the first time in like 2 weeks. Ive had 2 weeks of rehearsals and shows with the band, all at night. I think tonight will really help, doing nothing for awhile tends to refresh me, mentally especially.
is this normal?
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